


The Doe

by TriStarRebel09



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:54:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22748899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TriStarRebel09/pseuds/TriStarRebel09
Summary: What happens if Lily Evans left James Potter before Harry was ever born?
Relationships: Lily Evans Potter/Severus Snape
Kudos: 37





	The Doe

He would never forget the first time he saw her; running across the playground, red hair blowing behind her, her sweet laugh tinkling through the wind. He heard her sister yell her name, "Lilly!" Lilly, he liked that, he thought, rolling it over and over in his head. Lilly. Hidden in the bushes, he watched her for at least a week. Going over and over in his mind what he would say to her when he finally had the courage to come out of his concealment. He knew she was a witch from the start. When she jumped in the air, she hung there, suspended, till coming down gracefully on the tips of her toes. Flowers blossomed brighter when she picked them.

Their first meeting was a disaster, but over the next few weeks of summer, their friendship grew. One day, at the end of July, she threw herself into his arms breathless, her Hogwarts letter clutched in her hand. "Severus" she gushed, "Severus, I got it!"

Severus Snape was the only person Lilly Evans knew on the Hogwarts Express. Nervously, she waited on the platform, eyes wide at the new world spread in front of her. Owls screeched, and cats hissed from cages, here and there she saw someone wearing a long, flowing robes and a pointed hats. Tightly, she grasped her parents' hands, peering through the smoke from the train, searching for that one familiar face. Finally she spotted him, long black hair and pale face appearing through the mist.

Together they walked down the long corridor of train and nervously talked about awaited them when they would reach Hogwarts. Their ride was interrupted when two boys named James and Sirius burst through the sliding door and immediately started laughing when they laid eyes on Severus. Lilly thought they were stuck up jerks.

"Come on Severus" she said pulling him to his feet and out of the compartment so they could find another, less annoying place to sit. Severus gave the boys a sly smile over his shoulder as he exited into the corridor. Despite their taunting, he couldn't remember ever being happier. He was away from his parents and their constant fighting, he was on his was to Hogwarts, and he was with the prettiest girl in the world. Very soon they reached the station and made their way to the boats that would take them across the lake to the school. Severus made sure that he was in a boat with Lilly, and he watched her face light up as she caught her first glance of Hogwarts, a giant castle on a hill, thousands of windows glittering in the darkness. She grinned at him, and when the boats docked, they walked through the huge wooden front doors together.

Lilly was uncertain about the sorting. All of the first years had spent the train ride over talking about which house they wanted to be in. Having grown up in a muggle house, she hadn't grown up hearing all about them like some of the kids. Severus has told her that he wanted to be in Slytherin, so she guessed that's where she wanted to be to. When it was her turn to wear the hat, it thought for a moment, and then shouted out "Gryffindor!" She took off the hat, set it down and made her way over to where the Gryffindors sat. One of the stuck up boys, Sirius, she thought, was already sitting there. Over the next few minutes the other boy, James, who had been on the train joined the table as well. Finally, "Severus Snape" was called up to the stool. The boys started sniggering, so Lilly threw them a dirty look and crossed her fingers under the table, hoping that Severus would join her too. It was only a second after the hat touched his head that "Slytherin" was called out.

"Figures" muttered the boy with dark, messy hair. Lilly saw Severus throw her a sad look as he headed across the Great Hall, and she found herself wishing she was at that table too.

Over the next few weeks at Hogwarts, potions quickly became Severus's favorite class. The main reason being that it was the only class first year Slytherins had with the Gryffindors. Whenever possible, Severus and Lilly were always partners, the only two in their year to cross the house lines. Those hours in the dungeons were the highlight of Severus week. He would complain to Lilly that he never got to see her, and she would smile and tell him that she missed him. Together, they were the stars of potions class. The teacher, Professor Slughorn, raved at their combined abilities. He stated that he had never seen first years so talented, which always prompted taunts and jeers from James and Sirius who called them teacher's pets. Lilly always just stuck her nose in the air and ignored them, but Severus couldn't help but notice that James would glance at Lilly when Sirius wasn't looking.

When their first year was over, Lilly and Severus went back home and spent a long summer lying in the grass together and wishing they were back at Hogwarts. One day, as they gazed at the clouds, Severus reached over and ran a hand through Lilly's auburn hair.

"You're my best friend Lilly Evens." She grinned back at him, green eyes flashing, just as he loved. "You're my best friend too, Sev." While they spent their days happily enjoying summer a dark shadow was descending upon the wizarding world. They didn't fully understand what was happening, but Severus overheard enough to tell Lilly that there was a dark wizard silently causing terror across England. So terribly were his deeds that he was only referred to as "He Who Must Not Be Named". What Severus didn't tell Lilly was that he snuck his mother's wizarding newspaper out of the garbage when she was finished with it, and got a silent thrill every time he read about the Dark Wizard.

In September, Lilly and Severus returned to Hogwarts, and as the years at school began to pass, Lilly noticed that things were gradually changing between her and Severus. They were still best friends in name, but things were different. She had her Gryffindor friends, his from Slytherin -none of whom she liked, they all creeped her out -and their own activities. They still regularly talked in potions, but Severus now laughed at things he didn't used to, like people getting hurt. He discussed spells he wanted to invent, all of which seemed rather gruesome in Lilly's mind. And even as she missed their carefree, childhood days, she knew deep in her heart, that Severus wanted to join the ranks of You Know Who.

In was in her firth year that Lilly found herself facedown in her four poster bed, tears flowing freely. It had been a bad day; a horrible day in fact. She had had a huge fight with Severus. She had called him out on his desire to use dark magic, and he had been cruel to her. Even though it was several years in the making, she felt as if she had finally and irrevocably lost her best friend. In all actuality she had, after today things would never be the same between her and Severus. And then there was James. Good looking, popular, stuck up, conceited, arrogant toerag James Potter. He had been asking her out all year. She couldn't understand what so many of the other girls saw in him. All James cared about was himself. She rolled over onto her side, hot tears trickling down her cheek. Closing her eyes, she tried to shut out her day. Finally she drifted off to sleep.

Severus stared at the dark ceiling of his bed chamber. His jaw clenched as he replayed his fight with Lilly. He shouldn't have said the things he did, but it was none of her business what he did or didn't do. He had been laying there for hours, his emotions fluctuating between anger and grief. He had loved Lilly since the day he first saw her, and now she was furious at him. He would apologize tomorrow, he decided. They were best friends; after all, she would forgive him.

Lilly was too mad to forgive Severus. He begged her, and she turned her back and walked away. What he had said, and the fact that he was caught up in dark magic was unforgivable in her mind. She found another partner in potions class, and she tried to ignore the looks of desperation he sent in her direction. It was just too hard to be friends with Severus Snape. It was not too long before a certain someone took advantage of Severus's absence from Lilly's life.

In their final year at Hogwarts, Severus was dismayed to find out that Lilly Evans and James Potter had been named Head Boy and Head Girl at Hogwarts. He had noticed the smiles they gave each other when they thought no one else was looking, and one time he had seen them strolling down the corridor together, hand in hand. The sight had made his blood boil, and had sent his back to the common room fuming. He pulled out his wand and began hexing everything in sight. Lilly was his, she had always been his, what could she possibly see in that bully James?

As their seventh year continued on, Lilly's relationship with James began to grow. However, outside of Hogwarts, the dark threat was worse than ever, and a gloom of despair began to creep over the air of the school. People were missing, people were dying, and the Wizarding community lived in fear. And the whispers that spoke of You Know Who grew louder.

It was a beautiful day near the end of the term, a week before exams commenced and James and Lily took a well needed break and walked down to the lake, hand in hand. They flopped down on the shore of the, and let the warm breeze carry away some of the stress of studying. They were silent for a while, but after several minutes James spoke up.

"Lily," he said, tightly holding her hand in his own, "Lily, I love you. I can't go a minute without thinking about you. I want to be with you always." Taking a deep break he plunged on, "Lily Evans, will you marry me?"

She started nodding before he had even finished talking. A tear ran down her cheek, but at the same time she was laughing. "I love you so much James. Yes, I will marry you." And as she looked at James, the very last things she expected was a picture of Severus to pop into her head, and a pang of regret at the way things had ended between them.

Severus was looking out a window in one of the Hogwarts towers when he noticed James and Lilly down by the lake. James was holding her hands and looking very serious, and then she was nodding, and laughing, and they were both kissing. The sight was too much for Severus to stand; he turned away from the window and immediately went to the Owlry. He called down an owl and scrawled 5 words on a piece of parchment, "I am ready to join." He sent the owl out the window and waited to hear back from you Know who's followers, the Death Eaters.

As soon as Hogwarts let out for the summer, James, along with his three friends, joined Dumbledore's secret society dedicated to fighting the rise of You Know Who and his Death Eaters. Lilly reluctantly followed him, knowing that she was fighting Severus, whom she couldn't seem to get out of her head. The group was known as the Order of the Phoenix. In addition to the five young Hogwarts members there was Dumbledore, his brother Aberforth, and famous Auror Mad-Eye Moody. In addition, there were two other Aurors, a married couple, Frank and Alice Longbottom. They had been at Hogwarts the same time as James and his gang, only four years ahead of them. Every time the Order would go out to fight the Death Eaters, it was with a heavy heart that Lilly would go; terrified that it would be Severus she would have to face.

Two years passed, Severus fought and spied for You Know Who, always trying to focus on the Dark Lord, and not on Lilly Evans. One night, he was preparing to go on a mission for the Dark Lord, when a tiny owl flew in threw the window of his home. The message it carried was short, "Meet me in our field at midnight." Severus's heart began beating faster; there was only one field he could think of that anyone would know, the one where he and Lilly had watched the clouds as children. Was this letter from her, what did she want? He knew she fought with the Order, could this be a trap? He could not abandon the task the Dark Lord set for him, but he could not resist the spell Lilly Evans held over him.

Quickly, he left his house, listened as ordered and quickly reported back to the Dark Lord. It was 11:55 when he arrived in the dark field outside his childhood home. The night was inky black and full of fog. He did not see anyone and began to grow uneasy. Could Lilly have betrayed him? Was the entire Order of the Phoenix about to emerge from the blackness?

Then, out of the haze, he saw a gleam of silver, and a doe, crafted from a pearly white mist lightly walked towards him. "Lilly," he whispered, reaching towards it. As his fingers grazed the silver mist, it disintegrated and he saw a figure emerge from the gloom. The figured lowered its hood and shook out a mane of fiery hair.

"Hello Severus," Lilly said.

"What do you want, Lilly." He replied, still wary of her intentions.

"You." She said simply. "I can't stop thinking about you Severus. I want to be with you."

"You gave that up a long time ago, didn't you though," he replied curtly.

"Please Severus," she begged. "Let's run away together, let's leave all this, this war, and this place, let's go somewhere where it can be me and you alone forever."

His heart tugged at her words, but he was still hurt. "One doesn't just leave the Dark Lord's service" he said. "You know that, and what about you? What about the order, what about your fiancé?" He pronounced the word with a sneer.

"I love you Severus," she replied, "It's you I want, it's always been you. James and I…" She trailed off looking down. His heart began to melt, but before he could think of a retort, she was in his arms, hair blowing around his face, kissing him with blazing passion. He lost it, all inhibitions, all loyalty to the Dark Lord as he melted into her kiss. When finally they stopped and stared into each other's eyes, she took his hand, and together they aparated into the misty night.

A month later, Severus and Lilly received an owl at their tiny house on the seashore. The letter enclosed told them that the Dark Lord had murdered Frank and Alice Longbottom of the Order of the Phoenix, but when he tried to kill their son, Neville, his powers had broken, and he had disappeared. With the Dark Lord gone, the future was little brighter for Severus and Lilly. Lilly smiled at him, and he kissed her cheek. Hand in hand they walked back into their home together.


End file.
